my heart will go on

There goes myself again. L.O.V.E. And my heart will go on. It aches when I feel the love knocks on it. Once in a while, I could not help myself being stranded in this sick feeling. It is more like a war or a thunderstorm or something that makes me somewhat scared...or worried that I never be escaped safe and sound. Since I had once frustrated with my first love, I don't put hopes on having a relationship with someone. But still the curiosity of meeting my destined true love keeps pounding the soul. Oh, the worse thing ever happen is that I am now has developed the unwanted feeling towards someone...whom I never met in real or even talked on the phone. I would say I hate it yet I can't deny.

I knew him through the so-called hi-tech cyber-world. Aha..few of my friends might know this guy (shhhh!! don't you tell others aa..) because I talked about him quite always..hehe. I had accidentally added him as my cyber friend at which actually I just wanted to see his beautiful scenery pictures; captured and edited. He accepted me. I was so happy. Remember, always expect the unexpected! He asked me whether we knew each other or not...nice and very decently...with sense of humor. Arghh! I never wanted it to be happened. I've regretted. Yet it is not his fault to be so much friendly with people, now I feel like to push him out of my life. And delete all the memories with him. In quite a little time, I had so much to not to forget him. I might say he likes to flirt with girls, collecting girl-fans (instead of girl-friends) of him..ewww ~ see...now the jealousy biting me in and out. I love him. It sucks! Waaa...why he did this to me?

Flirting? I realized it for long time enough. He flirts with me..just like with the other girls out there. I've read an article on "The things we talked about", saying the reasons for a guy to flirt.

"Well some men flirt just to see if they got it 'Game' that is. It's just a way for them to solidify what it is they already believe. Sometimes, men even flirt just to get a girl to feel good about herself, even if he isn't interested in her. Men flirt many times just to make women feel good and lift up her self-esteem. And sometimes, to be honest, men flirt because they are looking to take it that step further especially if they see that they do have a chance, meaning if the girl is giving the time of day"

These are not what I've been dreaming of. None of them.

(naaahhh...not so serious lah.cik lebah just want to test. urghhh...my english~ keep reading!)

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my perfect coffee-mate ^_^